Morons Hurt too

When I met my hubby I was thrilled to know he had kids but then disappointed to learn that he wasn't in their lives. I had always secretly hoped that one day this would change. Slowly this did change with the oldest, found the son and then the youngest found hubby. Things were starting to look like somewhat of a family. Not so distant after all. I guess with my experience of an absent mother, then a dreaded step mom, I learned to keep to myself and have found it very difficult to extend that closeness that some want. I do have a huge tender spot for the grandkids but most of the time feel like I am a fake, imposter, unwanted extra family member. Honestly since I haven't birthed or raised any children, I am at a loss as to how to be or not to be. I know some parents, step parents and in laws that are all up in their grown kids business. I have always disliked that and well frankly wouldn't know how to be like that. With grown step kids, I honestly don't know them all that well. I guess I don't know how to get people to open up to me or vise versa for that matter. I want to but don't know how to be the "Pushy" one. I'm not the type to reach out and impose my presence onto a person and of course neither is my hubby. Hubby being an absentee father with all of his kids, doesn't know how to be any different than what he is. A laid back recluse or hermit if you will. He is the type that if he has something he needs to talk with you about then yes he will painstakenly use the blasted phone. He is not a sit on the phone chatting the day away kinda person. If "they" (anyone, not just the kids) want to talk to me then they would call. Heck he doesn't even call his own mother (who he loves dearly)! Unfortunately, this is the total opposite than want one wants. What they really want is their father and for him to be better than what he is. Sadly, he doesn't know how to be more than what he is and for some that is just not enough. I know that feeling all to well. My expectations for my birth mother were crushed and I hate to know that I am party to those feelings for one of his kids. BUT I got a hard lesson on how it feels to be on the side of not living up to expectations. Let's just say it hurts just as bad, if not worse. I "DO" understand the other side of it and totally agree we are morons on how to impose ourselves. Sorry I can't continue...

My December... Day 4

Joyous... well if you really know me than you would know I am joyous (not a word I use, ever) at how my little crochet business has kept me pretty and steadily busy for the last few months. A true blessing when one was needed.

I guess my biggest joy is that I have a hubby that doesn't drive me crazy...much (hehe). I talk to my mom every day and the things she deals with from my dad...lets just say... Oh boy, do I love the hubby! He would never do or demand like dad does. BUT then again, I would never do or demand like mom does. (love you guys) Just thought I would throw that in before I get in trouble! LOL!

Another joy I get is listening to my namesake in the evenings over the phone. I can hear her giggles, screams happiness and sleepiness. The joys of bath time, the squeals of delight over green beans, the screams that the cat took her crayons, the giggles of chasing said cat... the girl just makes my day! ♥

That is about all I can think of at the moment, the pain pills are kicking in so I best bid yall a goodnight.

Oh wait.... grandkids...It fills my heart up with joy every time I think about our beautiful and wonderful grandkids.

Okay, now it's a good night.

 

Grandkids vs the camera

I was just sitting here recalling the day. The glorious day I spent with my grandsons and daughter Jennifer.

AND once again I have no pics to show for it. I'm shaking my head at myself. I will grab my camera for just about anything. Heck, I ran out the door this morning in my stocking feet just to try to get a pic of a peacock strutting down the road. So why don't I hound the kids with the flashing light of my camera?

Well I have come to the conclusion that...

1) getting a pic of the oldest without a funny, goofy face is nearly impossible. LOL!

2) Getting a pic of the youngest is very hard to do, his attention gets pulled away quicker than I can click. LOL!

3) It is so much more fun to be there at the moment and for every "Nana" moment that arises, than to have my face hiding behind the lens.

All very sound reasons.

But dang it they are growing up soooo fast and Nana needs pics!!

So...boys you better watch out cause next time I see you, you are going to get blinded by the light!

Toys, Positive Thoughts, Hubby's Funnies and Doggie Birthdays

One year and two weeks later from my fourth post (back before I had followers), we were back at the store for a replenishing of Nana's toy box. After a year of playing, things got broken, lost or commandeered by the dogs. It was time to find some new and updated toys. The rules were basically tossed out, except for the no weapons part. I was no help to the process, I ended up getting things with small parts and and way over $10 a piece. Shopping fail on my part but once again the kids did fabulously at picking out some great toys.

I just spent over an hour CUTTING these toys out of their box's/package and ready for instant play! It's not like you can just give a child a toy straight from the store anymore, you have to have a friggin degree to get them loose from their theft ware packaging! By time I was finished I had three large bags of trash, that is plastic, wires and bulky cardboard! (Fisher Price..really, what is up with that?)
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In other news...

Positive thoughts for

Angelia's new hubby Jason. He is currently in the hospital with possible heart trouble. Haven't seen an update yet. Anyway, please keep them in your thoughts (they are supposed to be on their honeymoon, not having all this happen).

My SIL is going in for surgery Tuesday, need some more positive thoughts there too. With the new baby and brother with a new job, need to hope that the surgery isn't invasive to the point of being confined to the hospital for days. (As usual they won't know how invasive it will have to be till they get in there)
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Hubby comes home and asks if I bought new flowers.
Me...No I haven't, not in a few weeks. Why?
Hubby...Where did those yellow ones come from?
Me...(giggle) One has been there for three weeks and the other for two weeks!
Hubby...Hmm, they sure are purty.
Me...LMAO! (He walks by them everyday and just now realises they are there!)

(Them stupid horse apples)
Hubby...What'cha got planned for tomorrow?
Me...Nothing, oh wait, I have to go grocery shopping. Why?
Hubby...Well I was going to suggest that you could tear open those apples and see how many seeds you can get from them.
Me...(Stares at the boy like he has gone insane)(Shakes my head)(Starts giggling at my response forming in my head) I don't think that is something I would like to put on my list, sorry!
Hubby...sits there grinning and suppressing laughter
So guess what I'll be doing tomorrow...tearing apart a super sticky green brain like horse apple. Yuck!
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Today is Chaquita and Stitch's birthday! They are 8 years old! Where has all the time gone? (Getting woken up for birthday pics)








Have a good weekend!

P.S. Something is going crazy with my Nana's Nature blog, it's posting more than one a day and I can't figure out why. Sorry for the confusion.

Family Reunion - Part Two

Just thought I would share some pics of our weekend.

Family Reunion - Day One

Friday evening I was a ball of anxiety and excitement. I felt like I wasn’t getting anything done or prepared right. Thankfully hubby went through the check list and we confirmed everything was A. Okay. BUT of course I still had that nagging little voice in my head that I was forgetting something. I had to walk away and turn it down to a whisper just so I could try to get to sleep. I slept four hours and walked out to the living room to find hubby still up. I asked him what was the matter and his reply was “I’m too excited to sleep!”

For my hubby this day was a lifelong dream that was finally coming true. All of his kids and grandkids together at last. It’s a miracle he slept at all! I had to remind him that if he didn’t get SOME sleep then he wouldn’t be able to make it through the day. That got him to sleep! BUT I had to wake him at 5 am to get the brisket fire going. Then I went back to sleep.

Hubby woke me with “They’re on their way!!” Son called to let him know and get directions. Hubby told me the directions he gave and I briefly said “They’re going to get lost”

The rain had been threatening to pour down all morning, but I don’t think anything could have dampened our moods. It did drizzle and then sprinkle, each passing wave of moisture seemed to be harder than the one before.

We got everything ready and waited. Hubby was outside sitting on the patio and I was pacing all over the place. I looked down at hubby and asked are you still so excited and all I got was a shake of his head and a grin, but his eyes never wavered from the gate. It was like he was using all his will power to force a car, any car to come on in. I was getting worried, yeah I can’t help myself. I called to see how far they are. AH, they stopped at the store. I told her she didn’t have to bring anything but I sure am glad she didn’t listen to me.

The girls and their families arrived and yes we were all having a wonderful time seeing each other and learning about the grandkids and life at home, but you could tell we were all waiting anxiously for the main event. The son and family that none of us have met. Well that is, except for hubby. Hubby was there when son was a baby and toddler, but had only seen him once since and that was nearly 10 years ago. The girls and I have talked to them on the phone and corresponded through Facebook, but it’s just not the same as getting to hug someone and experiencing them in real life.

It had been another hour since I talked to them and they still hadn’t arrived. Yup I knew it…they were lost! Not badly though, they were here before the kids and I could get to the stop sign. I quickly ushered all the kids back, I couldn’t wait to get son and family in my arms!

The day was wonderful with lots of food, hugs, catching up and playing around. Hubby smiled from ear to ear all day long!! He was having a glorious day; rain had no affect on his moment!

The kids and I went for a short walk, but if you ask Bryan he will tell you it was a long walk! We played, climbed, walked and talked. We did some Baby Shower Bingo, lots of fun there! Then the computer got turned on and let the games begin! Lots of fun playing with the umbrellas in the rain. The umbrellas didn’t survive, but I’m glad nobody got hurt while playing with them. Yes, I was a little worried of that.

There were tiffs and there were tantrums and even an ant attack, but all in all it went really well for eight kids in my small trailer and yard. Funny how what I perceived to be a large trailer and yard doesn’t appear to be with nearly 20 people in and around it.

Granny and Aunt D arrived and I have to say watching the reunion from that perspective was very touching. Seeing granny play Free Cell with her great granddaughter was awesome. Four generations in one house, I honestly never thought it was going to happen. We are so grateful that the kids pulled this off, they are the ones that planned it.
AND from my understanding there is already one in the works for next year. Fingers crossed!!!! I’m going to start saving NOW!

The day started too wined down and granny had already left. The younger grandkids were starting to look kinda tired and so was I! I rushed everyone outside while the rain had given us a break and tried to get some family group shots. I did get some good spousal shots, but I do wish I had managed to get some individual family group shots. You should have seen how difficult it was to get a pic with all eight kids in it. That was a riot! Hubby wanted a whole clan pic, but that didn’t happen either. Maybe next year!

I was under the assumption that this was it, we weren’t going to get to see them again till next year, thankfully somebody told me that the plans had changed and we were all meeting up at granny’s house tomorrow. So letting everyone leave wasn't nearly as painful as I was prepared for it to be.

One last thing… A huge thanks to daughter K! That girl cleaned up my whole kitchen, even though I was continually protesting that it wasn’t necessary. Oh and for not listening to me about bringing anything, she made the most delicious cheesecake dessert I have ever had! Can’t wait to get the recipe!

Thanks to everybody for coming and making history happen! I loved every minute we got to spend together!

A Momentous Moment In Our Family History Is Happening TODAY!!

Well today is the day I have been waiting for since I meet the hubby.

Hubby has 3 children all by different mothers and we have had somewhat of a relationship with the oldest daughter and just in the last few years a great relationship with the youngest daughter. BUT we have never been able to have any relationship with his son.

Hubby got to meet him once a while back, but I will be meeting him for the first time ever TODAY! Noonish to be precise! Not only will I get to meet him, but also our daughter in law and our grandson. Oh I should mention that we will also be meeting another grandson from the oldest daughter.

The last time we saw her, she had just given birth to her 3rd child, now there are 4.

We have missed so much in all of their growing up, I hate that but you can't change the past only the future.

This is going to be a momentous moment in the history of our family. All three kids in the same place! The girls will be meeting their brother and his little family for the first time also!

All the grandkids will be meeting each other too!

Can ya tell I am excited, well I am!!

Nervous too. I don't know why but I am.

This is history in the making folks and I am blessed to have it happen, finally!

Will have all the details for you next week.

Gotta go wake the grumpy old man to get the fire started for the brisket. Yumm..BBQ!

Walking with the grandsons

Yesterday I had my two youngest grandsons (from the ones that live the closest to me) for five hours. We started the day at the bright and early hour of 9 am. (Yeah I know not really early for yall.) The two bundles of energy showed up at Nana's house with a gleam in their eyes. I could hear the mental questions of.. What are we going to do first?
Tell Nana stories.
Drag out all of our toys.
Find out what Nana has for food.
Well they were all firsts, all at once!

This Nana, although having been up since 7am, thought she was prepared. The kool-aid was made, even an alternative drink (for those moments when you get..I don't want kool-aid anymore!).

An activity was planned (seriously, what was I thinking). Well, that didn't last long! They were done in less than 20 minutes! Well at least I got some new art for my fridge!




Okay Nana, think!
Turn on the Nick Jr. Okay so far so good. BUT come on Nana, you can't let them sit in front of the tv all day. Not good enough! Think harder!
Interruption in the thinking process...
I'm hungry! Yeah ME TOO!
I want a banana!
Split banana. I didn't want a banana! Not doing so hot Nana, only one kid happy.
Crackers! They always gobble up the crackers. 6 crackers a piece should hold them off for a while, RIGHT? WRONG!
15 minutes later, right in the middle of racing cars I want some more crackers! Nana's thinking.. My goodness I still haven't eaten yet and they already want more!
When the clock says 11 o'clock, then we can have some more.
Every five minutes...I think it might be on the 11. It's on the 11! How much loooongggggerrrrr!
6 more crackers a piece dished out. Happy for the moment.

Hello, Nana! You do realize you still have at least 3 more hours of entertainment to publish! Eureka, your most brilliant plan! Yes, a nature walk is perfect! It takes time and draws them away from the lure of boredom food.

You want to go for a walk?
A resounding YES! Thank you, thank you, thank you!!
Let the adventure begin!

First we discovered a very large trash can..Nana what is that called? A dumpster.
Then it was a tree..Nana what kind of tree is that? A palm tree.
Ohhh, looook at the little tiny sunflowers! Here Nana I picked this for you.

Nana!! Nana!! There are snakes everywhere! Grab a stick!


Nana!! Did you see that butterfly??

Nana!!! WHAT is THAT?? A donkey.
Nana, this is going to be a long walk.

Look at that hole! I wonder what lives in there?

Nana, is this dog friendly?

Look at the windmills!! Why are they different? Why is one going faster than the other?

Nana's little helper


Nana! Look a duck! Why is it in a pen?

Every tree giving some shade was a good chance to rest.




Do you think he is tired?

Finally back at home!

After refueling with lunch and sticking our faces in the A/C, there was more fun to be had.
We played ball, fixed the porch and harassed the neighbors cat!
Where's MY kitty? That is MY kitty! Come here kitty and let me take you to my house! (My house actually meant under the porch in the dogs pen)


WHAT A DAY!!!!

Anniversary BBQ with Daughter and Grandsons

Okay well, lets just throw away Saturday's sadness and scariness and get back to more normal activities around here.

It was a really good week except that it has been so humid outside that it is practically dangerous to be out in. It is like breathing hot water with all the oxygen zapped from the air. There has been some nice moments of breeze, but the humidity makes it impossible to enjoy for long.

We did have a great day on Thursday with daughter #2 and the grandsons. Although hubby was a little on the cranky side. The kids (being kids) were coming and going, in and out. The door was hubby's biggest issue. The kids are not used to pawpaw's rules about closing the door after you go through it. Then when they did catch on, it was too frequently getting opened and closed. I think he was a little on the panic attack side. He pulled it off nicely and kept his cool. He joked, grumbled and locked us out!! Several times!! LOL! It was reported that I was begging to be let back in, I forget, it must have been the heat stroke!! LOL!

At the end of the day he said..I'm sorry we didn't have enough money to go out.
I told him that it turned out lovely regardless and Spending time with the kids was great, but exhausting!
He chuckled in agreement and said..I would have rathered had gone out! LOL! (He was just kidding!)
We then spent the rest of the evening laughing and chuckling over the kids antics.

Antics...

Hubby had chopped down the destroyed peach tree and left the limbs all over the ground. I kept seeing the kids stumble over them and had had enough and started dragging them away (in the heat of the day). 10yr old and daughter is helping, 5yr old picks one up and drags it away and announces...I'm done!! I couldn't help but laugh!

I'm sitting on the floor after fixing the broken leg to my coffee table (that is not 3yr old proof). Daughter is trying to get the boys to pick up all their toys and put them back in the toy drawer. She starts clapping and singing..♪This is the way we pick up our toys♪ I was putting the things back on the coffee table and suddenly felt under pressure to get my stuff off the floor!! LOL!

The back door remains locked and Pawpaw locked the front door. 5yr old goes to front door knocking, no answer. He then goes to the back door knocking and then again back to the front door. What did he want? His brother to come outside! All that, just to get brother to come out! Cracks me up!

5yr old found my gardening hat, is running around wearing it. 3yr old notices and wants one too. He then proceeds to try to get pawpaw's black felt bowler. Pawpaw grumbles NO to him and this produced tears and whines, but not for long. 3yr old grumbles right back at him in his best pawpaw impression! They had a stand-off! LOL!

The hat issue was not resolved. I got down some of my older gardening hats. Three grandsons, three hats. Should have been an easy fix. NOT! the fight ensued over who gets what hat and little one being the most stubborn was not a happy camper at all! He insisted he wanted pawpaw's hat, a bwack (black) one! I was going to send them off with my hats, but the fighting would not stop. Remove the hats from the scene and all should be well. How did that work out Daughter? Did they cry all the way home? Lets us know!

It really was a great day, even though it was boiling outside and pawpaw was grumpy. Sorry to cut this short but I have a massive amount of blog reading to do, most likely won't get but a 1/3 of it done tonight.

Weekend Pics

Sharing some of my best pics from this weekend with the grandkids.