Monday, December 27, 2010

Dizzy Randomness

Most of ya know already by Facebook, but just incase you don't know...

We ended up having to get us a newer car/van. It truly wasn't a popular desision in this house. We were both scared out of our minds, still am actually. This was hubby's second time going through a dealership, my first. Hubby's first was back in 77', so in a way he was a newbie at it too.

The loan asspect of it all has me frazzled more than anything ever has. I am sooooo not used to these super high numbers. Hundreds scare me, thousands freak me, tens of thousands...I am losing my mind!!! I just don't know how people do it without panicing. I know lots of folks that turn thier cars in for a newer one all the time and it doesn't seem to phase them all that much. I am a "What if" kinda girl but yet can't afford all those "what if's", which in turn throws me into an even bigger frenzy. It's a vicious cycle with no end.

I have been crunching numbers all morning and still don't feel any better. Cancel this and that, pay off this and that. If I use the money I have now to pay on this, will I be able to find this amount again in just a month. OMG!! I can't stop! I so wish I had some calm right now. Even the sweet birdie at the window ain't getting it.

Okay, hold on...let me try to refocus my thoughts. Back of the brain please, BACK OF THE BRAIN, I SAID!! Happy thoughts, happy thoughts. Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens...Did yall watch that last night? I did. Hubby was asleep within the first 30 minutes! Musicals are just not his thing.

We had a good time at my brother J and SIL J's for Christmas. Just a food get together for some of the family. Thankfully there wasn't the added pressure of gift giving, but I did get to deliver the blankets that I did for them.

Hubby gave me a new hand mixer, fry daddy, blue jeans and a sweater. I got him a shirt, new longjohns and something from the sports store. AND then there is the van. I give. The brain won't stop thinking about that car and all the stress that comes with it.


I guess I better sign off now, before I drag yall through the ring around the rosie's going on up there in my mind.


Thursday, December 23, 2010


While sitting outside on the porch, this is what I heard:

Dog growling

Squirrel barking

Birds singing

Woodpecker pecking

Kittens mewing

Traffic roaring

Water dripping

dog scratching

Leaves rustling

Wind blowing

Doves cooing

Windchime chiming

Hawk screeching

Train whistling

Fly buzzing

Crickets chirping

Trees creeking

That was only in ten minutes.


Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Watching the Lunar Eclipse


For the first, time I got to see the lunar eclipse. Yes, there have been many partials and and totals in my lifetime, but for the life of me I don't ever recall seeing one before.

Apparently last night was a once in a life time event for us, unless we figure out how to live hundreds of years. The last total eclipse to happen on the day of Winter Solstice (first day of winter) was 372 years ago.

Hubby and I knew it was coming and were watching the clock. Hubby crashed out on me at 9pm (way past his bedtime). I stayed vigil in my quest.

12:30am come and I was outside looking up at the sky. Slowly, there was just a smidgen of a shadow in the southwest edge. I guess I thought it was going to go by fast (silly, now that I think about it) cause I went and woke the hubby.

Shortly after 12:30am

We were standing on the porch with heads held back, eyes to the sky. Waiting...Watching...
Hubby's head started hurting and my eyes were losing focus. Lets go in and wait a few minutes. But before we could get to the door, suddenly we was surrounded with the howls of what seemed like every dog or coyote in the area. It was very strange and eerie. Chaquita, who went out with us, got really scared. (so did I)

Around 1am

Around 1:30am

The fog has rolled in pretty thick and the vision is getting harder to see. This really tested my knowledge of my camera to get any visible shots.

Around 3:00am

That is it, folks. That is all we were able to see. By the time that we should have been able to see the reverse side the fog was so thick we couldn't even see the trucks in the driveway.

Nothing but the street light was visible

Hubby said...That was cool and thanks for waking me.

Pretty neat.


Wednesday, December 15, 2010


The Christmas cards are done.
The second blanket almost finished.
Christmas is 10 days away and I'm not ready.
The sky is gloomy and the air is way too crisp.
The trees are bare and the ground is crunchy.
One truck is broke down and the money is not to be found.
Family drama continues on, season doesn't matter.
I'm feeling a little scroogie. Bah humbug.

Well now that I got that dreariness out of my system, lets move on to better things.
I finished the first blanket of the season.

To my bf's surprise (and my own) who is always on me about finishing things. The last blanket I did (for myself) took me two years to finish and the one before that three years. Yes, I am a very slow crocheter and do procrastinate ALOT.

The second blanket of the season:

Just two more stripes and then I can put it together and trim it out. Must finish before Christmas.

Currently waiting on my order of a series of books by Patricia Hickman. She writes religious novels set in historical time periods. They are so well written, I sometimes I forget they are fiction. As most of you know, I'm not big on religion but every now and then I dabble.

Just in case I don't make it back by Christmas, I hope you all have a very merry one.


Wednesday, December 8, 2010

One of these Days!

One of these days I am going to be down one less cat! The monster Whiskers has been at it again and OMG I am so friggin MAD!

Apparently the birds are out and about trying to feed up for the winter or something, cause there are a crap load in my yard and driving Whiskers to run from window to window. Like here he is now, he just jumped up on the desk to chase ...what? A bird, a lizard, the tree branch is moving in the wind...who knows!

Thank goodness I don't need my mouse at this point, cause his butt is on it.

I'm sure your wondering why am I so mad at him...
Well, see that window there, note that it no longer has a screen on it.

That's right this stupid cat seems to think that if he body slams the screen in pursuit of a bird than he will catch it. Instead the bird gets away and he is hanging from a very old screen that rips from its seams and comes crashing down.

Chasing birds is fine but when it tends to destroy my house, then it is war!

There are about two dozen doves out there under the tree.

It is going to be a long day. I wonder what else he is going to destroy. Gawd I hope it's not my curtains! He wont live if it is!


Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Tidbits of the Vacation / Holiday

Miss me? Well even if you didn't, I missed blogging.

Vacation is over for now and I am much happy to be done with it. It was 10 days of laziness. Laziness is good sometimes but I was sooo ready to get back to our regular routine. Hubby would differ in that opinion, he was whining that it wasn't long enough and went by tooo quickly. Awww, poor baby, now get back to work and outta my hair! Just kidding folks! It was fun and I do love having him around (but only if I can get some work out of him). Okay I'll stop picking on the boy. Maybe!

Sooo, what did we do on our vacation/holiday? Let me just say it was nothing like we had planned for the first half of the year. Plan was to do a triangle of the state of Texas. To do a whole lot of visiting with family and friends throughout the state. We had such lovely plans...sigh. Well life had other plans. Things broke down, extra expenses came up and before we knew it the money we had saved back was gone. Sad.

We instead had a staycation here at the house. Although we did spend a lovely time at his niece's for Thanksgiving. Resigned to the idea of having to stay home, I had visions in my head of all the things we could do at home and possiably get done. I guess I do tend to get carried away with my ideas, cause they didn't match up with hubbies ideas at all! LOL!

Hubbies ideal staycation is to sit around in his chair and be glued to the tv. Syfy all day baby! Sleeping in late with no alarm clock buzzing him awake (yes, I admit that was nice, realllll nice!).

The biggest difference of opinion came about four days into it. I was informed that I was slacking on getting the coffee ready for the next morning. LOL!
Me...that is cause I'm on VACATION!
Hubby...NO I'm on vacation!
Repeat this several times back and forth and we was roaring with laughter!
Needless to say..If he wanted coffee before I got up (which was the whole vacation), then he had to make it himself.
Okay I am cracking myself up (I'm such a mean old lady), lets move on.

Excuse me while I go change out the washer and dryer.

We had our first freeze the other night and stupid me forgot to put my plants up or wrap them. Some survived and some didn't. It wasn't a harsh freeze just right at freezing temps. We had to dig out the heaters for the first time and in response to the artifical heat, my hair now looks like I rubbed a balloon on it. It's not a pretty sight and is driving me insane! Okay fine, it's not a long drive but I am sooo there!

In the crocheting news...
Bf and I pledged 8 scarves for the Special Olympics and have 14 ready to mail.
I am four days away from finishing my brothers 7ft x 7ft blanket.
I have been asked to do a king sized blanket for other brother and his lady's first place together.
Currently waiting on some yarn I ordered to come in, so I can finish the lap blanket for my chair.
@ Kaylen...Wish I could have donated some yarn for your drive, but the expense to ship was too much. Sorry. Glad to hear you got the hooks though.
Looks like I'm going to busy for the rest of winter.

I guess that is all I got for today, talk at cha later.
Yall have a great day!


Saturday, November 20, 2010

"Poor Folks That We Were"

I was standing over my chair folding laundry. Some of the laundry came from the dryer from the forgotten load of last week. I am forever forgetting that last load. I noticed hubby's shirts were wrinkled. DIL's comment on a questionarrie came to mind..Pet peeves..wrinkled clothes. I busted out laughing!

I then got to thinking about when I was a kid. Yes, we ran around in the wrinklest clothes you ever saw! There was teasing from fellow students, but I was yet to learn the solution to the problem. I'm not even sure we owned an iron. Anyway when I was a kid we went to the laundry mat. "Poor folks that we were" we had to go about this in a system. First there was the food stamps, you know the paper ones from way back. Momma would send each child into the store with one dollar, we had to get just one piece of penny candy (remember those) and bring back the change. The change then became the laundry money. Again, "Poor folks that we were" we didn't have a car. The solution to this problem was to always have a shopping cart from the local grocery store at the house. We would stuff as many clothes as we could (for our large family of 6) into pillowcases or lay out a sheet and fill it up and tie the ends together. Stuff all this into the shopping cart and push it about two miles to the laundry mat. Most of the time this was me pushing and demanding the rugrats (my three much smaller siblings) to hold hands, stay out of the road, stop running off, don't eat thaaaaat! Fun times (NOT)!

You must know though that this was a step up in our world. Going to the laundry mat was hitting the high times. It was a heck of a lot better than filling the bathtub up with soapy water dumping the laundry in and putting the smaller kids in to stomp on the clothes, repeat the process for rinsing, then bend over the tub and wringe everything out and hang it all out to dry. Chapped hands anyone! Especially hated when the freeze came overnight and your clothes were still on the line, frozen stiff! There was many a times when I would go to school in wet clothes. Sooo yeah, going to the laundry mat was a huge step up. Except for the embarrassment factor.

Back to the laundry mat...We get there. The process of doing laundry took hours, the kids would get bored, fuss, cry, tantums were common. Finally the laundry in the dryers come to a stop. Hopefully they are done, cuase money was scarce and I had to stuff as much as I could in them. Sometimes I even had to bring them home still damp. Well with the kids and the massive amounts of laundry and the time (and my patience) running out, I very rarely folded anything (I think I remember folding them three times). I would just stuff them back into the pillowcases, load everything up and we would walk the two miles back.

Now the reason we never had unwrinkled clothes is because those pillowcases full of clothes rarely ever got folded. Yeah, dad bellowed all the time for me to fold them, but seriously after the excursion I went through, that was the last thing I wanted to do. I did my duty even though I hated every minute of it, but I was done! Let someone else do it! (Gawd I was an awful child)

It's funny now that I think about it, in just a few short years later..Wrinkled clothes where in fashion! LOL! You know the long skirts that you purposely twisted to get that broomstick look. I was ahead of my time! LMAO!

Now I do fold my clothes fresh from the dryer, except for that forever forgotten last load. Thanks DIL for the laugh and memory!


Tuesday, November 16, 2010


The storm breaks
The cold sets in
The ashes fall
from the burning end
(Just something off the top of my head)

Oops, it wasn't supposed to publish, my bad!

Saturday, November 13, 2010

New Glasses

So as you know I have been a little off lately with headaches and dizziness and I pretty much limited my computer activities to Facebook only. A quick on and right back off again. I did do some research into my symptoms and concluded it was a vision problem.

Well that figures since I haven't been wearing my glasses for some time cause I broke them for the third time in the same spot. The area is soo full of super glue that it wont even go together any more. Soo they have been sitting in the desk drawer for months. Occasionally I would try to wear them with one bow but that is a little difficult with them sitting on my face crooked!

I finally checked the books and figured a eye exam was possible, then I was reminded we had to get propane for the winter. While in my debate as to what would get done cause both wasn't possible, I was reminded that I would need my eye sight to light the pilot light! Yeah makes sense! The propane would just have to wait.

I went to the store and on the way home I went the back way, which came out right next to the convenience store. I quickly pulled in. I had quit going to convenience stores cause it was too easy to fall into the trap of scratch off tickets, the money guzzling wastes of paper. I had conquered that addiction two years ago and avoid the convenience stores like the plague. Well the back slider that I am, I went in and bought a $5 ticket and won $100. Woohoo! (No worries I won't be falling back into the trap) Now I have the money for both items!!

Yesterday was the big day, the eye exam. I was curious as to how much different my eyes are now compared to how they were 6 years ago, but apparently they don't keep the records of folks that don't come on a regular yearly basis. I have no clue what my script was back then. This time I was informed that my script called for bifocals, but the doc said they were optional at this point. Yikes! Seriously? When the heck did I get old enough for bifocals? Thankfully I learnt that the bifocal part would be a non script section in the lens, with the script in the upper portion.

As finances as they are I opted out of getting them. I kinda wish I hadn't but oh well I had to do what I had to do. The doc said all I would have to do is remove my glasses when I was reading or something was right in front of me, but definitely need them for driving or anything some distance away. The problem already has risen from not having them. To crochet in my lap and try to look up at the tv occasionally is not working. With my glasses the tv looks great, but with them crocheting looks weird.

Looks like I'm going to have to work on saving some more so I can go ahead and get them. Sigh. I had turned grey, produced a colony of wrinkles and gone snaggle-toothed, so why not just go all the way and add on some bifocals. How many more steps till I am officially considered "falling apart"? LOL!!


Sunday, November 7, 2010

Taking some time for the Special Olympics.

So your probably wondering what happened, where have I been, what have I been up too?

What happened...Well first I got sick but was still trying to stay with it. The lingering dizziness and fatigue that is still here, but has eased up a little, have really taken its toll on me body and mind. If you feel neglected, you should see my house! Hubby has done the dishes for me many times since this thing set in. Bless his heart!

Where have I been...Well I'm embarrassed to say I have been right here, hiding in the cloud of a mindless woman. Okay that was stretching the truth, but it was like that at first. I guess you could say I detached myself from blogger, not literally but mentally. I know it's not fair to yall for me to be soo neglectful, it wasn't intentional,, it just evolved it to a blah. Matter of a fact all my Internet experiences of late have been a blah. Does that mean I am done with blogging? No, it just means it's a little slow around here in this old brain of mine. Maybe I will slow down for now, hubby has been very happy to have lots of my attention and it's been good for me too.

What have I been up to?...Crocheting! Yeah it is finally in the temps of crocheting weather. It is a passion that definitely interferes with blog reading or creating, very difficult to crochet and blog at the same time, well at least for me it is.

My perfect model

I finished up some unfinished projects and went looking for yarn on ebay, when I couldn't find what color I was looking for I went to the Red Heart site. My world changed for that one decision. Up at the top of their site is a "Follow us on Facebook" button. I did that! Then I learnt of the Special Olympics Scarf Project. The details are here, just in case your interested as much as I am. I even got my bf to get busy with some scarfs and trying to talk the old man at our local craft store to put up flyers.

My current work with the Special Olympics colors

It's funny..last year I pretty much skipped crocheting season and this year I can barely put it down. I am having a lot of fun, knowing some of my work is for such a good cause doesn't hurt.

The scarf I sold

Oh and I posted my finished work on the Read Heart Yarn Facebook page and sold my first scarf! I guess you could say that motivates me even more to get the most out of this season as I can. I also signed myself up for the next available knitting classes here in my local town, that should be interesting.

Hope yall wont miss me too much, but I'll still be around just not as often. Okay soo back to work I go!


Thursday, November 4, 2010

Writer's Workshop: Favorite Actors from my Childhood, Plus One I Adore!

I chose writing prompt #1..What actors from childhood do you think about?

When I was a kid my favorite actors were:

First and forever there was Michael Landon:

Little Joe Cartwright in Bonanza

Pa-Charles Ingalls in Little House on the Prairie
(I soo wanted him to be my daddy)

Jonathan Smith in Highway to Heaven

Then there was Lorne Greene:

Ben Cartwright in Bonanza

Adama in Battlestar Galactica

And of course there was Victor French:

Isaiah Edwards in Little House on the Prairie

Mark Gordon in Highway to Heaven

I can't forget Parker Stevenson:

Frank Hardy in The Hardy Boys/Nancy Drew Mysteries

Craig Pomeroy in Baywatch

Now we get to the man that makes me catch my breathe everytime I hear him speak. The most amazing Sam Elliot:

Gar in Mask

Wade Garrett in Roadhouse

I'm thinking..Wild Bill Hickcock in Buffalo Girls

Virgil Earp in Tombstone

Just to name a few, cause there are soo many more movies he was in that where great.

Ohhhh yeeeaaahhhhhhh!!!!

Excuse me...Brain overload

Hope that was fun for yall!


Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Waking the Hubby

I sit in my chair with the foot rest up. I have a dog inbetween my calves, another along side my thigh and another at my hip. They are all under the blanket we use to cover ouselves, then I have a cat on my chest and another up on the headrest grooming my hair.

It is almost time for the alarm to go off for hubby to get his day started. As soon as he is up, I get to go to bed. Which is a good thing since I have been fighting sleep for about an hour already. I wish I could trust him to get up on his own.

Beep, beep, beep...

Dear! It's time to get up!

Beep, beep, beep...

Dear! You need to get up!

Beep, beep, beep...

Dear! Are you going to get that?!

Beep, beep, beep...
Grumble. Arm comes out from the covers and groops the air. It finally moves and manages to turn it off. AND he falls back to sleep.

I grab the remote and put the tv on the news.
2 minutes..Dear! It's time to get up!
Grumble, but no movement.

3 more minutes..Dear!!!
Movement at last, but nope were not there yet.

I tap Peach on the butt and she jumps down. I throw back the covers and 3 pairs of eyes stare at me like I am crazy. I say..up, up, up, let me up. Two get down.

I go get his coffee and stand at the table, waiting.
Dear! Here's your coffee!

It roars like a bear that has been disturbed. He blindly groops the table, when he finds nothing, he tries to go back to sleep.

Deeeeaaaarrrr! Your coffee is going to get cold!

I'm up.
His mouth says it, but his body didn't hear it.

I reach down and take the covers away from him. If that doesn't work then I shake his body at the shoulder.

*Cough, cough, cough* *Hack, hack* His body moves to get to the spittoon and whalla he is finally up.

Good morning dear!

I wait for the 2nd cup of coffee to be made, then I throw back the covers again. Okay kids, it's time to go to bed! We all get up.

As I drag my tired body towards him for a kiss, I say:
Love you Dear. Have a nice day.
Love you too and if you say so! or Love you too and I'll try to!
No matter how many times he says it or different ways he says it, I still manage to smile and chuckle.

I force the dogs outside for one last reststop and then it is off to dreamland!

Love yall and have a nice day!


Monday, November 1, 2010

Weekend with Hubby

Saturday I went to the flea market. I was really in the need for a personal shopping trip, even though it wasn't an extravagant trip (15$), it was alot of fun just browsing around for a little while. Then I went grocery shopping, which is always an exhausting ordeal. The store was packed with last minute shoppers for Halloween, I was just doing my weekly shopping. I came home content and tired. I saw hubby was already home and I was thinking I was finally going to get some help with carrying the groceries in. NOT! (normally he would)

This is the reason why:

Here is his story (after some henning from me about bring things home, but this time I was kidding cause this work bench he really needed):

He saw this man on the side of the road selling alot of things but mostly he saw that bench. On his way home he stopped to look it over. He asked the man how much. The man said he wants a 100, but he would let it go for 85. Hubby lets him know he only has 65, so if he was still around next weekend he would give him 80 for it. The man mulls it over and says he would hate to have to come back next weekend, so he will take that 65. Hubby spent all of his saved up pocket money, but personally I think he made a good deal. Anyway he was piddling with his new toy that came with a vise and a bench grinder with a light. Very happy hubby! BUT he had to work really hard to get the shed cleared out to put it in there. Soo he was happy, but tired.
Saturday night we watched Scared Shreikless, yeah it was funny! Loved it when gingy was telling his story! I tried to stay up to watch Gremlins, but couldn't stay awake. I thought I was going to take a short hour nap, it turned into 5 hours! I know, I was just as surprised! I stayed up for 5 hours and then slept even four hours more. NINE hours of sleep! Blows my mind!
Sunday morning I had soo much energy, must have been from all that sleep. I attacked the kitchen and started moving things and cleaning behind and under and a little reorganizing. Plus putting a roast on.

Hubby the channel flipper, was bouncing between the race and old scary movies. You know..Boris Karloff and Vincent Price, then suddenly it's Brian Vickers and Clint Boyer. I let him do his thing, well cause...both were good choices and I was watching both with him.

Suddenly out of nowhere (most likely brought on by a commercial) I say this:
Me: Soo, you think we will get any trick or treaters?

Hubby: Me!! (with his hand out)

Me: You’ll have to get dressed up in order to get any candy.

Hubby: What I’m not scary enough right now?!

Me: I‘m laughing and decide to share this with yall and as I walk by he says

Hubby: “Hey”

Me: Yeah

Hubby: “BOO!!!”
Hubby later out of the blue says:

Trick or treat?

I get up and go in to look at him.

I say (Stupidly)..TRICK.

Hubby: Ohhhhh, you are sooo in for it now! Your gonna wish you had given me a treat!

I laugh and come back to the computer.

About 20 minutes later, while sitting here all engrossed in what I am researching...

BOOOOOO!!!! Right in my ear, with finger jabs to my sides!

#@%&!!! Scared the "you know what" out of me!

I spent the rest of the day buying yarn on Ebay, finishing up the mess I made in the kitchen and watching Avatar with hubby (my second time, his first).
Not a single trick or treater as I knew we wouldn't. We haven't seen one of those since the late eighties!
A very nice weekend with the hubby. HAHAHAHAHA (insert evil laugh)


Friday, October 29, 2010

Grateful for my Poverty.

Today was a time to be grateful for what little I do have.

My childhood friend called today just to have some one to listen to her and hear her woes. We have talked many times in the last few months since we got reconnected and it has been great getting to know her again, but something in me is off. I feel a great sadness for what all she has been through and what these things have lead her life to. I guess I thought that with age comes wisdom, but for some reason this doesn't seem to be the case. Maybe I said that wrong, it's not that she hasn't learnt wisdom from her experiences, but it doesn't seem to have gotten her to change the path her life has been on for all of her life.

When I first met her she was just as poverty stricken as we were. Only difference was we were a family of 6 and they were just her and her mom. My dad worked his scrawny butt off to provide for his large family and they got a monthly check from the VA. I remember a time when she and I was talking and I learned that the check they got was for a thousand dollars a month. I was in jaw dropping awe! I couldn't understand how come they couldn't make it, when their money was 200 more than dads money. To tell ya the truth I still don't get it.

They rented just like us. They didn't have a car just like us. They struggled for food just like us. And so on and so on. Our lives were nearly exact, except for the size. They moved nearly as much as we did, but for different reasons. Our reason was crappy landlords that didn't want to fix the places up. They moved in the search for something better. At least I think that is why they moved all the time. I can't be positive, it may be something deeper that I never knew about. I do know of a few times it was to get away from all the drama in their lives or to just leave it all behind them and start fresh in a new place. I understand that to a degree, I did the same thing when I moved away from that town and came here.

Any way what I was trying to get at is that for some reason her life hasn't changed at all. They are still in the extreme struggling mode every month. They still move from one place to the next, it is almost as if they get restless after a few years and have to start over in order to keep things in chaos. Her life is chaos to me and for that feeling, I am upset with myself. It was a long time ago that I was in the same situation, but surely I didn't forget. I have become comfortable with my life, stable hubby, stable house, stable income (Most of the time, except for in the winter).

I guess in my mind all them years we were apart, I figured her life to have become like mine. Settled, fixed, stable. I was expecting to hear about her long lasting relationship and the wonderful hubby, the place she has been working, the house they finally found after searching for so long and the kids all doing well in school (even collage perhaps), blah blah blah. Basically I figured her life to actually have turned out better than mine. Reality check, this did not happen for her. None of it actually, except for the good boyfriend for the last 2 years and one child who left home at a young age and got an opportunity for himself and is currently in college. Well at least there is that, right?

For me all the moving around as a child lead me to NEVER want to move! The chaos of boyfriend after boyfriend lead me to hold on tight to the best man I stumbled across. Just kidding but you know what I mean, right?

The finances of poverty lead me to sacrifice all niceties just to make sure the bills were paid and food on the table, for me that comes first above all else! I will wash my hair with dish soap, if that is all I can afford to do. I will not drive my truck more than absolutely necessary (like 8 miles a week, most weeks). I will not eat out, when it is soo much cheaper to eat at home. I will not buy those jeans or tennies I need, if it means not paying something. This is something I have learned (Through our phone convos)that she still hasn't learned.

Like she was just today, returning a wanted item just so she could get some needed items.

My life is not all that it could be, but at least I don't have to worry about paying the bills or having at least some food on the tv tray. Even if we do eat chili or spaghetti three nights in a row or a brisket for a week, at least we have food.

I just never thought our lives would be soo different. I know I have changed and some would say "Hey what happened to that wild and crazy girl?", But I say (after learning what happens if you stay that way) "Thank goodness she got lost somewhere along the way!" I can NOW imagine just how my life would be, if I hadn't had changed my life and mindset around. I would be right there along side her struggling for every morsel, every roof and in as much emotional pain.

Maybe our losing each other way back when was an unforeseen blessing. Is it wrong that I am having a difficult time with all of this? I am finding myself pulling away from talking to her as much and I feel awful about it. Like I am betraying our friendship over something that she has no control over. She is who she is and I feel like I need to step down off my short pedestal and be there for her, but I am finding that difficult without getting angry at her for not trying to change her situation (even just a smidgen). It's like I knew her, but I'm not understanding the woman that she has become. I don't know how to get past this ugly feeling of disappointment.


Well anyway, this has all made just a little more aware of just how grateful I am of how my life is/has turned out and appreciate all the more of what little I do have. It could definitely be worse, as I am slowly remembering (I guess I did kinda forget) and learning.


Saturday, October 23, 2010

First Memorable Sunburn

Searching through the last few writing prompts from the Writer's Workshop, looking for something to activate my brain.

"It was a bad burn. Tell about the worst sunburn you ever received. How did that happen!?!"

Well this one could work but I'm going to change it a little. I'm going to tell you of the first sunburn I remember getting.

I was 11 years old and we were having a yard sale. We were preparing for our journey across the world. (Well that is how it felt at the time!) We was headed to the wasteland of Texas. From what I had see in the westerns on the tv, it was a land of desert with no trees and mirages of water. I was scared, worried and very much in protest, not just in words but in actions too.

I was told that I had to down size all my belonging to ONE small suitcase. We was selling everything for money for the trip. I mean everything, from clothes to toys to beds. I trudged around in a sour face at every purchase that was made of my things. It was bad enough that I was being taken from my friends, grandparents and even my cat, but to have to watch these strangers walk off with my treasured toys was unbearable. Everything that I forced into my suitcase was at least safe.

I was dressed in a girls undershirt and a skirt. For those of you who have no clue what a girls undershirt is Except mine had lace around the edging, with a little bow at the neckline. Not much different than today's regular shirts.

My dad was yelling at me to go get a shirt on and I was being all rebellious and refused. (What it really was.. I didn't want to let my parents see what I was keeping in fear that they would decided I had to get rid of it.) I guess he got tired of fighting with me, cause I wore that undershirt all day with nothing else on top of it.

The next morning when I woke up my skin was tight and when I tried to move the pain crept in. Yup I had a sunburn on my arms, shoulders, neck and face. I was scared and yet fascinated. I keep remembering me standing in front of the mirror checking it out and touching it, watching the flesh go from red to white and back to red with each touch.

Of course my mothers cure for all things was Epsom salt and Calamine Lotion. So after soaking in a bath of grainy salt, I was lathered up in pink! I was not a pink kinda girl, so you can imagine the horror!

Guess I should have listened to my dads yelling and went and put a shirt on! LOL!

Little did I know, I was moving to the kingdom of many many sunburns!


Friday, October 22, 2010

Spin Cycle: Then and Now

Sprite's Keeper

Then.. I wore make-up, LOTS and LOTS of make-up. Must hide and pretend to be someone else!
Now.. Maybe twice a year, I dig out that fake face (that now weighs a fourth of what it used to).

Then.. I colored my hair. I spent sooo much money and time and worry for something so trivial.
Now.. I'm enjoying my grays, they are coming in nicely.

Then.. I bejeweled myself up. It was the thing to do, necklaces, earrings (more than one pair), rings, bracelets, broaches.
Now.. Two rings is all. I prefer to be seen instead of hiding behind the ornamental glow! Today folks have earrings in places I don't even want to know about!

Then.. I spent hours getting my hair perfectly curled and sprayed into place. Sleeping on bulky curlers, burning myself with a curling iron, sweating to the heat of a blow dryer, choking on the cloud of hair spray.
Now.. A ponytail will do. Wash and go!

Then.. I did everything I could to try to look in fashion (Thank goodness fashions were nothing like they are today). Dresses went down to the mid-calves or just above the knee, jeans actually covered ones butt and the wait lines were at the belly button. Shirts covered the essentials!
Now.. I have no clue what happened to the rest of the material in today's fashions. I bought a new shirt and had to give it away cause I was constantly trying to re-adjust it to fit properly, you know..COVER!

Then.. I thought I knew all there was to know.
Now.. I laugh at that thinking!

Then.. I watched cartoons.
Now.. I watch the news. (When the frack did that happen?)

Then.. I loved Freddie!
Now.. What the heck was wrong with me? I can't even hardly watch any of the new horror movies out nowadays. (Sorry Spot) Blood and guts has lost its appeal.

Then.. I could have cared less what was going on in the world unless it messed with MY world.
Now.. well lets not get into that, it's chaos in there (pointing to my head)!

Then.. I would turn the light off and run and jump on my bed so the monsters couldn't grab my feet and drag me under to eat me.
Now.. I sleep with a night light and three dogs as my protectors!

Then.. I lived in a house of filth. Cleaning was high on the list of things I got in trouble for NOT doing.
Now.. I love a clean house and strive everyday to keep that way!

Then.. I wanted, wanted, wanted! Material items, that is. I always felt like we didn't have anything.
Now.. I realise I had all that was important. Family, health and.. well yes, even love.

Then.. Life without music was unthinkable, a crime actually.
Now.. I find that the only music I am exposed to is from the tv in shows or commercials. (My old classmate aka Orchestra conductor would definitely call that a crime!)

Then.. I slept peacefully and at least 8-10 hours.
Now.. Well..crap, I miss that!

Then.. The idea of a computer was sience fiction.
Now.. Well look at us NOW!

I could go on, but I wont. So if you want more on the then and nows, go visit Sprite's Keeper.