Sunday, June 3, 2012

"Have I done anything significant in the last ten years?"

Today marks the 10th anniversary of the day hubby should have been killed by that pipe that whacked him across the head and cracked two vertebra in his neck, busted his eardrum, broke his ear and a hairline fracture on the skull. This has left him in a strange mood today. I'm sure it didn't help matters that he had to put our cat down today, I know how much that pains him to have to do that.

He asked me a very powerful question that I at first didn't know what to say to.

"Have I done anything significant in the last ten years?"

I hadn't realized it had been 10 years since the accident, I didn't grasp to what he was referring to or looking for. I asked stupid stuff mean around the house, for us or generosity towards others?.

In general, he says. Like what have I done with the 10 years I shouldn't have had.

I was stumped.

But then I blurted out... you've been wonderful to me, you provide and are constantly doing things for me! AND hey we ended up getting married 6 years ago, that wouldn't have happened if you had died. PLUS you've had grand babies, to which he replied with a "that would've happened anyway". I countered it with "that you have been able to see and they have had the opportunity to love you. You also might want to think on would have been torture for your parents to have had to bury their son.  After a few moments of reflecting on these he agreed I was right.

AND now that I have had a few moment to reflect on this, I have come to the conclusion that it really isn't a matter of what you have done with your time it is that you were here for that time and just your presence has an impact on those around you.



Paula said... [Reply to comment]

I'm glad you're husband is still around and I'm sure there is some reason God spared him. One of my nephews was severly burned at an oil well. He is still around and that is a miracle. His then girlfriend went ahead and married him even though he is scarred to the point that people stare. They have beautiful children so I'm sure being spared has been worth it to him.

Carol said... [Reply to comment]

I love your comment that it doesn't matter what you have done, it only matters that you have been. Loving and being loved is so much more important than being noted in history books!

Lucy said... [Reply to comment]

Personally, having been widowed once tell hubby, You don't know how much you would miss him and you don't want to find out. It is the time that you and he are together that is so important and how lonely it would be.Plus you hit the nail on the head when you said it is the time you have that matters. I was 37 when I was widowed. It was sp lonely.