Friday, July 16, 2010

Funnies

Hubby comes home with a joke to tell me:

An older couple is driving along and they hit a rabbit. The old man gets out and grabs a spray can out of the bed of the pick up. Walks over to the rabbit and picks it up by its ears. He sprays the whole can on the rabbit, tosses it in the truck and grabs another can. He uses up that whole can and releases the rabbit. The rabbit gets up and goes ten hops and turns and waves, another ten hops and again turns and waves. The rabbit continued to do this till he was out of sight. The old man tells this wife, I gotta know what was in those cans. He reaches in the back and brings them to the light....

Hair restoration and permanent wave!
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I have told hubby of my plans for the yard and that I will be needing some small rocks.
Yesterday he came home and said..I'll load if you unload. I'm like, HUH?? The rocks you want, I will get them from work and load them in the back of my truck, but you have to unload them. Deal? Deal.
Later...
I really ought to go out there and unload my junk from the bed of the truck so there will be more room for your rocks. I nodded and said yes.
Since your going to be out there can you bring me a small starter planter. He looks at me with a frown, I said.. I OUGHT to go out there! What part of OUGHT to didn't you get. LOL!!!
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I had been trying to get hold of my dad all day and was getting frustrated.
I called my sister to see if she knew where dad was. Nobody was home, so I left a message.
Later that evening...
Boo calls me and says...Aunt Heather you need to watch your language! There are kids here you know! (She is the only kid and she is 12!)
What?! I was watching my language!
No you didn't, you said bad words!
My message contained...

Where the heck is everybody? Daaang!

Apparently, I said two bad words!

Seriously?????

The kid cracks me up!

Sigature,Heather

12 comments:

Stacy (the Random Cool Chick) said... [Reply to comment]

The joke was funny, but your hubby's comment about 'ought' was even funnier! :) And your niece is hysterical! Thanks for the laugh this morning! :)

SuziCate said... [Reply to comment]

Good thing you didn't really use any bad language or Boo would really get you!

Lucy said... [Reply to comment]

So you got put in your place for using bad language.???? At 12 I bet she has used one or two herself.lol I liked the joke.

Eternally Distracted said... [Reply to comment]

Boo is fab. Classic that she told you off... I hope you paid attention!!

Gonna try out the joke in the office now :)

the gold digger (aka Class Factotum) said... [Reply to comment]

A guy knocked on my door years ago on July 4 with a VW full of rocks. Asked if I wanted them for my garden. I did and we negotiated a price of $1 apiece including his unloading and placing them on the border of the flowerbeds.

He said they were from his sister, who had had some work done and had extra rocks, but I was suspicious. Hot rocks, maybe?

But who would steal rocks and then go door to door trying to sell them?

Angelia Sims said... [Reply to comment]

LOL@your bad language! I was told Crap was bad word the other day by a six-year old. Now what in the world are you supposed to say in place of that??? Apparently - Pickles!

lol.

Heather said... [Reply to comment]

@Stacy (the Random Cool Chick) Glad you had a good time this morning.

Heather said... [Reply to comment]

@SuziCate Oh yes she is the language police for sure!

Heather said... [Reply to comment]

@Lucy LOL! Yeah she tried! I'm sure she has, but she likes to mess with me.

Heather said... [Reply to comment]

@Eternally Distracted LOL! She is a riot! Nope didn't pay any attention, I was laughing to hard!

Heather said... [Reply to comment]

@the gold digger (aka Class Factotum) Yeah that does sound suspicious. Hot rocks for sure!

Heather said... [Reply to comment]

@Angelia Sims No matter what you try to subsitute it with, they will catch on and still call it a bad word.
Pickles is good. LOL!