Saturday, March 26, 2011

There she blows....

Well good Morning.

Boy oh boy yesterday was a doozy. I played peace keeper with my parents. NOT fun!

I guess as a child it is expected to have, see or hear your parents fight. Even then it wasn't fun, you sit in your spot and watch or listen in silence, with fear running through you. Fear of the unknown of how it is going to turn out. Are they going to leave? Are they going to hug and all will be better? The worst is when they stop yelling and there is a deafening silence between them and you know that you could set them off at any moment.

Me, being the hateful step-child...would side with my daddy and secretly hope she would leave. Somewhere along the way I grew up and became friends with my mother and started viewing her as a woman, a person. A person married to a man, that I would never put up with! Don't get me wrong, I love my daddy, but as a husband...Geezzz! Sometimes I think my mom is amazing to have put up with him for 35 years.

Yesterday, started with a phone call. Mom was red hot livid and finally blew her stack, she stormed out and quaked the house with the slam of the door. What happened to make her so crazy? Well, she asked dad to spend some time with her and he turned her down. Okay well, it really isn't that simple. I talk to my mom nearly everyday woman to woman, this has been brewing for some time. Dad's response was NOT the right thing to say to a woman that has a storm building inside of her. BUT, then again, poor dad. He was oblivious to what is her problem.

What is her problem? Well to be honest everything! She is stressed beyond what any person should have to deal with. Mom gets up each morning with a grunt, she just wishes she could sleep a whole day or two without something being asked of her. She has the grandkids to watch, nearly everyday. A daughter that is in the works of getting out of her abusive situation, with the help of mom. A husband with declining health, but yet still has the ability to demand this and gripe about that. An income that is soo small (I'm talking tiny), I am baffled as to how they manage. A housing complex that appears to be going under and dad wants to move back out in the country, while mom wants to stay in housing cause it secures her future once he has passed. Plus more children needing her help.
Oh and the topper of all this is that my dad is a hoarder, not like on tv, but he is always finding things folks throw away or just give to him. He is a tinker. Computers, appliances... the problem with that is that they live in housing! You can't be having all that stuff in those apartments or outside...Thus the reason he wants to move back to the country, no rules or regulations, no inspections, no limits. We all had hoped that dad would realise his limitations and abide by them, but instead the apartment looks more like a storage facility, which drives my mom MAD. AND we can't forget mom's own declining health.

I'm surprised she doesn't just freak out on everyone and totally lose her mind. Everyone needs something of her, all the time! I always wondered about why she hides in her room whenever she get the chance, now I get it. Me, I would be hiding under the bed with a note on the door "Leave me alone!" and the phones turned off! LOL! The poor woman is exhausted, all the time!

Soo in the end I am siding with mom and totally get why she blew up. Thankfully mom has a woman's retreat coming up and she is soooo looking forward to getting away.

Now back to me...Yesterday I felt like a marriage counselor, to my parents! I hope it will be awhile before this happens again, it is really weird and strange to have my elderly parents fighting. I felt like that little kid sitting in silence hoping for a good outcome. I still don't know the outcome, so fingers crossed!



Ocean Girl said... [Reply to comment]

My Mom calls herself Ms Spring Butt, meaning she has a spring in her butt that she cannot sit, not even for a while. And she demonstrates it too. Whenever she tries to sit, we can hear my Dad calls her for something he needs. I think I might blog about this.

Paula said... [Reply to comment]

When I was young my Mama and Daddy never fought or argued. Nice you say? Well it was kind of stressful too as Daddy would pout and not talk and could do it for a week. Hope things work out for your parents and doesn't bring you into it to make it stressful for you.

Anonymous said... [Reply to comment]

I know that awkward uncomfortable feeling. I hope it all works out!

Anonymous said... [Reply to comment]

I know that awkward uncomfortable feeling. I hope it all works out!

SuziCate said... [Reply to comment]

I hope it all worked itself out.