Pick-up Lines

In my time I have heard many different very lame pick-up lines.

From the most general...

Where have you been all my life,
God sent me an angel,
It's my lucky day to have found you,
You want to go to San Antonio?..I'll show you the Alamo! (that one worked)

To the disgusting...

Can I press my body to yours..I want to see if we match,
I bet you are superb in bed,
Can you stick out your tongue and twirl it for me?
I bet my Blank, will fit perfectly..you know where

Those are just a few, but you get the idea.

Well, I thought I had heard them all.

Now mind you...I haven't looked great since my late twenties, I've gained weight, lost many teeth and my hair has a lot of grey.

I was not in a bar, I was not drunk at a friends house...

I was at the...

GROCERY STORE!!

In the produce section getting bananas. I had to wait for a man to move out of the way, we made eye contact for a brief micro second. I ran into him again in the bakery and again he was looking at me, making the hair stand on my neck. I was starting to get a little creeped out by the time I got to the meats. While looking at the turkeys (the bird, not ppl), this man approaches and asks...


Have you ever cooked Chicken Fried Steak? Ahhh..yeah.

Thankfully my face was never good at concealing my thoughts, I'm sure it conveyed to him that I thought he was insane! He left my presence and thankfully I didn't see him again.

I can safely say I have never heard that one before!

WT*..?? That was the best he could come up with?
Was it a test to see if I was a good cook?
That is how it felt, like he has to make sure a girl can cook above anything else.
What did he think, that micro second was an invite? Geez!!

Hubby and I had a real good time laughing about that one!

*Sorry about the bad words*